voice (3 dec)

[barberian]

(This message begins with the maker of it clearing her throat.)

Hello. This is Yasha.

(Cool.

With that out of the way,) I wanted to offer my services in cutting hair for anybody who might like it. It's coming up to the end of a year and sometimes people like to look nice for that. Or maybe your hair has become too long over the course of the year. Hair grows a lot faster than you think it does sometimes.

Um... anyway. If you need a hair cut or maybe a beard trim I can do that. And I can come to your house to do them, I don't mind.

(Oh, one more teeny tiny thing:) Also the tools that I use are my broadsword. If you don't know what a broadsword is basically think of the largest sword you've ever seen and then maybe make it longer. That probably sounds bad but you shouldn't worry too much about it. I'm experienced.

Okay. Bye.

Comments

[shamebats]

Yes, do you offer bikini wax?

[nadja

nadja she uses a broadsword]

[barberian]

Yes.

(Yasha likes the directness.) Though I haven't done those as much.

[shamebats]

[With that thick, Eastern European accent, it's sometimes hard to tell if Nadja is being serious or not. But the fact of the matter, she is, as horrifying as that is.]

You're a talented woman. I'd ask you to cut my hair, but the fact of the matter is, it'd just grow back the next day.

[barberian]

(It's certainly an accent Yasha has never heard before, but then again, she hasn't travelled very far beyond the Xhorhasian wastes.)

Thank you.

Why is that? I did mention that hair grows back fast but... not that fast.

[agathokakological]

Oh was a big rock not doing the trick?

[barberian]

Why would I use a big rock when I have a big sword?

[agathokakological]

What's your casualty rate?

[barberian]

None so far. I have steady hands.

[devilstongue]

I swear by her excellent methods! I have never had smoother legs, and she's absolutely divine at facial hair. Just ask any dirty wizard you see!

[ Hype man™ ]

[barberian]

Thank you.

(It's important to have testimonials.)

... I've been thinking of cutting my own hair.

[devilstongue]

[ Only the best shilling for his Yasha. ]

Oh, yeah? Gave that some thought, did you?

[barberian]

Yes.

It would be different, and I think I might need that right now.

voice

[uptightness]

... you only use a broadsword?

[Not that she exactly takes the best care of her hair, but broadswords are, well, broad.]

[barberian]

Yeah.

(Perhaps Yasha's tone is far too matter of fact for this conversation.) I'm good at cutting things. Why not hair?

[uptightness]

I'm good at shooting things. Doesn't mean I'll be giving piercings.

[Not judgmental or anything. It's more matter of factly stated.]

[barberian]

Well... that's probably for the best. Ears are pretty delicate, you know?

(Hardly the point.) It kind of started as a joke. Between a friend and I, I mean. But then I ended up being pretty good at it, so...

voice

[postictal]

...you know some people here have razors you can use, right?

That might be easier than hacking at someone with a sword. A broadsword. Just putting that out there.

[barberian]

... But would it look as cool?

(Yasha isn't great at sounding like she's only joking.)

[postictal]

[In this situation, he really honestly can't tell what's a joke and what isn't without the aid of a facial expression to read, so he errs on the side of...not?]

Whether or not it looks cool isn't necessarily a big draw. I'd feel more inclined to get a haircut if it was being done with an ordinary razor.

Voice

[littlemhigan]

Do....you want a smaller blade? I ain't about the doubt you or yer skills with it, but a broadsword seems a mite overkill for sommat like hair, don't it?

Also, can ye do braids?

[barberian]

No. I like the one that I have, but thank you.

(why is everybody offering her smaller blades??)

Yes, I can do braids. I braid my own hair all the time.

[littlemhigan]

I can respect that; Seems everyone's got a weapon or sommat thats close to their heart.

I might have te take you up on your offer soon, then. I usually mind my own hair, but sometimes it's easier havin' a second set of hands to help.

voice

[lesbeau]

[This isn't super helpful since it's not from the same channel, but once Yasha's done making her broadcast, Beau also pipes up through her own stone.]

Everybody let Yasha cut your hair! She keeps my shit fresh as hell and I know you're all jealous about that, so get tight!

[She'll let that sit a moment before going back to addressing Yasha.]

It's like reviews. So people know you do a good job and then they wanna turn up.

[barberian]

Thanks. So far nobody is going for it.

(Maybe if Caleb were here to give his word too it wouldn't seem so suspicious. That would up the total of reviews to three. Three is a good number.)

Um, I'm probably going to cut my hair though. Short, I mean. To my shoulders.

[lesbeau]

Oh shit, really? Wait, with your own sword?

[thatshot.jpg. I wish I could say Fantasy Mulan here but Critrole is not as forgiving as TAZ in that respect, so rip.]

Why?