lifenet | WANTED: WOODWORKING TOOLS

[ That was weird! Magnus hopes those words were not all meant in succession.

But he doesn't give it much thought. Midway into the afternoon, he's standing by the rock and humming calmly, hatchet hanging from his belt, backpack set down by his feet, and in his hands...a glass ball? With a goldish in it.

And yes, the fish is alive. Just swimmin' around and being a fish. ]

[The community rock isn't terribly far, so it's not long after Magnus arrives that Guzma saunters toward him, his pack hanging loosely from one shoulder. He's emptied most of the usual contents - except for the necessities (water canteen, medical kit, and some rations) - and filled it instead with his trade goods. Seeing the big guy, Guzma lifts a hand in greeting.]

Yo, you the guy looking for the, uh... [He looks Magnus up ad down, assessing his size and build. Dang, son, homie here is ripped.] ...lumberjack stuff?

Oh, hey! [ Magnus, cheerful as ever, maybe doesn't seem or sound as threatening as his body size might make him seem. Which doesn't erase the fact that homie here is indeed ripped.

But he's not here for any sort of scuffle. He pockets the glass ball and rests his hands on his belt.]

Yeah, that's me. You, huh- sorry, been meeting a lot a' folks in these last couple of days. You are...?

Guzma. [Again, he eyes the big man up and down, assessing him. The voice certainly doesn't fit his brutish appearance, but then again...irony is the world's jester. Who would have thought Guzma, of all people, would be a skilled and powerful competitive pokemon battler? He's got a strategist's brain, despite his thuggish and grim, overtired appearance. He's also extremely fit and strong.]

Sorry, man, forgot yours. Never been a strong suit'a mine - names. [He shrugs his shoulders lazily. What? Its the truth.] ...Not unless y'all is worth remembering.

--Well. [ That sounded sort of rude. But he's not going to read too much into it! Maybe he was just making a point.]

Well, I'm Magnus Burnsides. And, huh, yeah, you had theeee...saw? Right?

[Burnsides? Mother of Mew, this bearman definitely does has the most epic lumberjack name of all time. Guzma quirks a brow once against as he takes Magnus in slowly. I mean, he's not the oddest creature here - that'd probably be Muffet, maybe - but he definitely has a, uh...presence. A very specific one at that.

Dropping his pack, Guzma kneels and tugs out the hand saw, blade wrapped messily in palm leaves and tied with rope made from coconut fibers.]

That'd be me, yeah. [He stands, holding out the leafy bundle.] Should work out real good, yeah...only used it a couple'a times myself. Gonna need it back when y'all is done. [Or, y'know, when he needs it.]

Sweet! Yeah, that'll work out fine. [ He takes the saw, uncovering it only partially to check the blade.]

It, huh, might take a while until I'm done, is that cool?

[ Since building a house from scratch takes kind of a long time. Also rebuilding a mess hall. And a couple of other small buildings...]

[The blade seems in pretty good condition, actually. It has some wear on it from when Guzma used it to help in the construction of his own home's roof, but despite that...it's not in bad shape at all.]

Nah, bro, dunno if I'll need it for a while....But, uh, if'n I do, I expect to get it back, yeah? Then y'all can have it back when I'm done. [A little off-and-on kind of deal thing.]

Oh--yeah, yeah, totally! [ Wording is poor, but he does mean it. He's not actually looking to steal anything from anyone. This time.]

Nice shades, by the way.

Huh? Oh...thanks. [Guzma goes a little cross-eyed as he looks up at the coke-bottle shaped sunglasses holding back the cloud of his two-tone hair. Honestly, he's shocked they lasted through the hell he's been through in this place, though Guzma is glad. He has a fondness for them.]

Nice, uh...fish. [#SMOOTH.]

Oh! [ He takes the glass ball out of his pocket and holds it up to face level.] Thank you. Steven's pretty great.

[ And Steven just, you know. Is busy being a goldfish.]

Huh...

[Guzma leans down a little, squinting a bit at the fish. It's like a weird, tiny mix between a Goldeen and a Magikarp. How freaking weird...he's still not going to get over how some creatures in other worlds are just so different than Pokemon. But there's also something he notices as well.]

How do you feed the li'l guy? There a hatch that opens up somewhere, or?

Oh, he doesn't need to eat. I think. I mean, I never fed him and he looks fine.

[ Yep. Yep, that's a thing. Take it as you will.]

[...I mean. It's nowhere near the weirdest thing he's seen and heard come up in this place. Guzma raises a brow, taps the sphere of glass lazily to get some sort of reaction from the little fishie, hen straightens up again. He won't judge your Animal Handling, broseph, but...yeah.

Weird.]

A'ight, not gonna say nothing to that. Anyway - deal stands. You get on doing what you gotta with that there saw, and if'n you get a chance to go hunting, I'd be more'n happy to get a piece of whatever you get, yeah? [He's getting really sick of fish, but actually slaughtering and plucking a Bludroc, or anything else for that matter, sickens him.]

[ Hey, man! He's good at that! And he's raised bigger fish! ~~He's not sure those count as fish but whatever~~.]

Oh, hey, don't... [ Don't tap the glass!

But, back to business.]

Yeah, sounds like a deal.

Got anything you're in the mood for?

There're a few abandoned pens for some big, blue birds 'round these islets. Someone was prob'ly raising 'em all, then up and left the islands or something. I get eggs from 'em all'a time and give 'em water, but I'd like to...y'know, get a bite of more'n jut their eggs, if y'all get me.

[The Bludroc pens, funnily enough, housed quite a few birds, and they've obviously gotten loose over time, but stick mainly to where their pen and home is. Foraging is easy for them, they pick off small insects and crustacean from the beaches and grasslands of the islets, but water is another story.That's what Guzma usually gives them when he goes to collect eggs.]

Even just one'a them birdies would keep for a long time for me'n my girl. [They're a decent size, and with his and Luna's ice box, and steady supply of ice from Ninetales, they can store leftovers for a few days. Not to mention, their down might make some good pillows and comforters...]

Oh, that doesn't sound so hard. I can't totally get one of those guys for you.

How big? Like, turkey size, ostrich sized, what?

[What in the world is a turkey and an ostrich?]

Wha--prob'ly like, uh...I guess like this big? [He holds up his hands a few inches apart, trying to mimic how big some of the birds can get and what they can properly eat in a few sittings.] Only two'a us and the kid don't eat too much.

Oh! That's not so bad.

[ Man, if they went into Pokemon, "regular" animals from Magnus's home and all the fantasy creatures he's seen through the years...the multiple real worlds are really some fantastic places.

He pulls his ax from where its held on his back, for emphasis. ]

Just get ya a couple of birds, then?

[Guzma eyes that ax for a moment and rubs his throat absently. All of a sudden he's starting to feel a bit bad for the poor birds. I mean, that's not going to stop him from thinking they're delicious and cooking them (and their eggs), but it's...woof. It's hard to see that big weapon and imagine a living thing's head just come clean off.]

Y-Yeah...just be careful when y'all go rustling them feathers, homeboy. The birds get mad rowdy when y'all mess with their flock, yeah? And they gang up on you. Grab one and get to gettin'.

[ He probably wouldn't like to go on adventures with Magnus. It's not so much like there's high levels of beheading, but just a lot of random carnage in general.

He doesn't seem to entirely notice the unease in Guzma's face, though. ]

Aw, c'mon, how bad can it be?

[ Famous last words. ]

[Oh, you sweet summer child.

Guzma raises a brow, purses his lips, then pops them as he stuffs his hands in his pockets. He shouldn't be condoning this guy's birdly demise, but what better way to learn not to mess with the blue chickens than to experience it firsthand?]

Well, y'all are welcome to rustle some feathers, but don't say I didn't warn you...

[ A lot of people would agree that Magnus is a very hands-on learner. Specially when it comes to whether or not you should fight a thing. ]

Aaaah, it'll be fiiiine. [ He gives Guzma a friend smack in the shoulder. It maybe be, perhaps, too hard. No harm?]

I'll getcha your big turkeys in no time.

[Grunting from the impact of the rough smack, Guzma rolls his shoulder with a slight wince. Ow? Ow. He's had worse, but homeboy here needs to watch who he's slapping around.]

Yeah, yeah...I'll be around. Just make sure y'all don't show up with no bleeding corpse at my door, yeah? Don't think my housemate'd take too kindly to that being fed to 'er. [Neither would he, to be perfectly fair.] See ya, big guy.

[And, with business done, he'll turn to go after telling Magnus where he lives on the islets, when he's got his butchered quarry.]

WANTED: WOODWORKING TOOLS

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been laughing at Guzma's assessment of Magnus ever since I first got this tag

HAHHAA yes good 8D

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