text ; 01/12 ; down by the pool he doesn't have many friends

[postictal]

just so you all know
i think theres a shark infestation
just in general
if theres water near you there will maybe be a shark in it

so until further notice denny isnt serving any drinks until we know there won't be sharks in them

thanks

-tim

Comments

[littlemhigan]

what the fuck

[yakyuuman]

wow holy crap!!!!

i wonder if the sharks here make for a good meat!

[ Priorities, he's got them. ]

voice

[eudaimonikos]

...any water?

[postictal]

you heard me

[postictal]

if you try hunting them do it somewhere without a lot of water
i think these things can spawn anywhere

voice

[postictal]

Well, I found some in the water barrels, which definitely shouldn't be able to fit sharks in them, so...I'd say yeah, just to be safe.

[yourattention]

fun fact theyre ghosts

[postictal]

do i want to know how you figured that out

[ichininyaanshi]

[wait - wait wait. Everyone’s dying of an emotions plague again, and now they can’t even get shitfaced to deal with it? Great.... it’s final. He’s absolutely going to croak this time too.]

Its fine. I’ll just get mauled. Happened before.

[yourattention]

are you telling me you didnt immediately try to punch it in the nose

[Not that such a thing actually works, but he was a little panicked when this happened.]

[postictal]

no problem
knew i could count on you for something like that

[This place has too many goddamn cynics.]

[postictal]

no
i don't usually try to punch sharks in the face

does that mean we literally can't even kill them

[eudaimonikos]

Do humans eat sharks?

[it's lucky these are ghost sharks because michael is formulating an absolutely wild plan right now]

[motherfucking_ghost]

have fun u ppl that have 2 drink water 2 live

[postictal]

Uh...I mean, yeah, I'm pretty sure.

[The trepidation in his voice is audible when he responds.]

...why?

[postictal]

thanks for that
anything useful to add

[motherfucking_ghost]

if they appear in any water cant they appear in u
arent ppl made ofwater
cells have water in them
do they show up in things not water
is coconut milk just water does that count
how much juice do we have

[postictal]

apparently not since theyre not showing up inside any of us
i think it has to be uncovered water
i shut the water barrels and nothing came out so that worked

i guess i could find out

[motherfucking_ghost]

maybe put straws in the barrels maybe theyll only come out in sunlight like if u put a hole in the top and put a straw in then its never really uncovered

[littlemhigan]

i did but please

elaborate.

because what the FUCK

[postictal]

are you willing to try it

[Then again...what does Tim have to lose here? His life? Yeah, sure. He's got flowers growing out of him now anyway. Like that's not already inevitable.]

[postictal]

somehow there are sharks in the water barrels
theyre definitely too big to fit in there but theyre there

so thats fun

[motherfucking_ghost]

cant drink
but like if u want me to stand w my face against a straw n see if jaws bites it off
cant rly make suction go 2 get the water up to said face tho

[yourattention]

at least one of the useless wizards has to be a necromancer right

[There's about a minute pause.]

on further thought fuck necromancers do you wanna do an exorcism

[postictal]

good point
i guess i could try it but even if it works i dont feel like rigging up a way to pipe everybody drinks

kinda not feeling great if you catch my drift