Connor Murphy (
yourattention) wrote in
lifenet2018-07-11 04:27 pm
Entry tags:
- coco: héctor rivera,
- dear evan hansen: connor murphy,
- hollow knight: the knight,
- red vs. blue: agent washington,
- voltron: keith kogane,
- ✖ captive prince: laurent,
- ✖ dangan ronpa: hinata hajime,
- ✖ dangan ronpa: komaeda nagito,
- ✖ no.6: shion,
- ✖ original: foster van denend,
- ✖ rwby: pyrrha nikos,
- ✖ the adventure zone: lup,
- ✖ undertale: muffet
forward-dated to very early on the 14th

[for those of you who are having trouble reading the font:
top text:
found this on umui w/ lup in a locked drawer
come find me if you wanna see the og ver
bottom text:
found these on a different pg w/ blood
and the rest of it is just a transcript of this.]

no subject
[There is absolute silence for several seconds, then a pensive humming sound. Cryptic and completely unhelpful.]
Mmmmm.
Time wasted on the dying is just that: time wasted. If there is to be purpose then there must be results, right?
If living is to serve any purpose, then dying must serve equal purpose.... if it does not scare you, if it does not inspire you, if it does not lead you into consequence, then there is no point. To assuage pain is to shy away from what power calamity, what powers life itself might put in motion to change reality.
no subject
I suppose one can bring meaning to their death with their choses actions, sacrificing themselves for a greater good. But, that is less their death having a meaning and more their life being something worth while.
Pain is for life. Death is for peace. Those who are gone, and should be remembered.
But, a terminal illness, there is nothing grand about that. It's a slow rott, watching the inevitable to come. A time to try and make meaning of your life. A time of reflection. A time to accept the price of things that have come. There isn't even hope that can spring from it. The only hope in it is if you're helping with some sort of discovery that can help others. And that is just too pretentious.
No. The terminal should live their lives as best they can, shine as much as they can before their light goes out. And if that means to try and do as much as they can comfortably until the end, why not? This place... I'm sure in a way this place let people Hope, hope that one day they would find an answer and a cure.
In that way, this place is beautiful.
Wrote this in bed on my phone
Cut off from the world of the living, a place where the only option is to rot, to die passively, to decay into obscurity... nothing greater to be achieved by your having died or lived. A death as pointless as your life... not that I would know anything else, haha!
Not yet.
But to accept comfort over purpose is to accept mundanity and denial as balm to your pointlessness, your wasted potential.
This place is the opposite of hope.
no subject
You're purposefully being blind to negate that.
And being too singular.
How dull.
no subject
Not that I can judge... I am not the saviour but the diseased, the wretched and incurable. I am the terminus of that which rots! Do you understand?
I am singular because there is nothing more singular than purpose.
If they didn't succeed, maybe there is a reason for that.
There is nothing more finite than time, nothing more real than mortality...! Effort without result is just more time wasted, corpses on the altar to mediocrity...!
no subject
Such as Hope. Hope is singular, but it births much more, it brings more than just itself. It is an all imcompasing concept that represents so many things.
These people display Hope. And even if they couldn't reach it in time, it will build. We do t know if they succeeded, but it doesn't matter if they did or didnt. They tried, they left their mark. There is a story to discover and put together.
You however are tedious trash. It feels as if you want to champion despair but without real dedication to it.
Worse than trash even... simply unimportant. Negligible. Utter pointlessness and a waste of breath.
It's a bit irritating.
no subject
None of us have time for you two to fight. - Hinata
no subject
This is being assaulted by insult personified.
CW: Self mutilation, blood (less than planned)
But! There are also a few words. Some of them are scrawled on the sides, like notes taken in the margins. They read:
TERMINAL CONDITION
TERMINAL PURPOSE
and
I AM MY DISEASE
What they are annotating is:]
Yes! Yes, I am worse than trash, lower and more insignificant, more pointless, more disgusting and repulsive than rot, I say nothing, know nothing, remember nothing. I am absolute nothing.
I was born less than nothing, a disease, a decay, and it is as less than nothing that I am meant to die. But it is as I am become worthlessness that I know its face. I am lower still than even the lie of hope, but by its absence I know its truth. Hope is a lie told by those in denial of their passivity, of their idleness, their meaningless existence. It is a lie assuaging their fear of pain, of mortality by perpetuating the mundane as a means to something greater.
This land is a monument to hope because it is full of lies.
no subject
There isn't even a reason to rebute you. Explaining it to such as you is a worthless endeavor and would more taint anything holesom and pure than educate someone with potential.
A blemish on the world.
no subject
no subject