lifenet | voice (backdated to dec 1)

[Kravitz very rarely makes himself known on the network, but this is one of those things he feels is Important in a way he can't ignore. It's not that he's looking for pity- rather, he just needs to inform people. There's no tragedy in passing. There's no fear in something he can't reach.

He wishes he could believe that anymore.]

Hello, uhm-- this is Kravitz. For those who may be looking for them, it seems Lup, Taako, and Ren have all departed from the island. My apologies to those who used their services or... simply knew them. I'm not able to carry on the magic they did, but I'll do my best in providing what you need if you were getting some kind of service or items from their store.

[He takes a breath, but it's shaky, and forces any other uncertainty out of his tone.]

I'd also like to remind everyone that we do have a library here containing many resources and a workspace for study. Contributions are always welcome, and I have a number of archived pieces from other islands for study as well. Feel free to contact me if I am not around and I will come to assist.

That... that is all.

[ooc: Kravitz has a shiny new library page on his journal now, if people want to get involved!!]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

you died from overgrowth didn't you

[It's a pretty brutal non sequitur that isn't really a non sequitur at all, but he thinks that it proves his point in the simplest way possible.]

[Not that Tim himself survived either.]

[Brutal... but effective. Kravitz swallows, thinking about it, and responds quicker than he means to.]

I suppose you're not wrong.

I just didn't have the words for it then. I'm not sure I do now. They will just be sorely missed, and saying that a lot of times doesn't really fix it.

does talking like that help you feel better

[You know. "They will be missed," in a general term, like couching misery in vagueness will make it easier to bear. Not I'll miss them. No, of course not. Just an impersonal statement - they will be missed.]

you think i don't know what it's like
you think i don't exactly how that tears you up

This was not meant to be a personal slight. I do not wish to insinuate that you do not understand.

This is simply... not only about me. It is about everyone who ever knew them, everyone whose lives they have touched. I want to respect that.

[Also known as, he never thinks it's entirely about him. He's removed from it. Things are never his, they're transient, they're as long as he can hold them before he's alone again like he always knew he would be. It's... just how it goes. Just how it runs.]

so you're not allowed to be a mess about it
got it

my point isn't that we've all dealt with this shit
we all have obviously
my point is that you're not letting yourself deal with it

[Not that Tim has much room to talk, again. But playing armchair hypocrite happens to be one of this talents.]

[It's a minute or two before he responds; even with the stylus making his typing speed much faster, he deletes and rethinks his words here a lot.]

I do not have anyone to listen that is not experiencing something worse. How would you feel if death came to get you from dying and wanted to have a conversation about themselves?

I simply know how much we are all going through. And I don't know how to ask for someone to listen without feeling their problems are paramount to mine.

There. If you were looking for reasoning or something. I don't think this is what you wanted.

you're not a death cop here anymore dude
you're just some guy

and so fucking what
your problems aren't bad enough or something?
what does that matter
do we have to search for the one person in the entire universe who's suffered more than anybody else and they get to complain but no one else does or what

I don't think so. In terms of looking for the most suffering person, since I don't think there is such a thing.

But you do bring up a good point. We all have issues. I simply didn't want to overwhelm others. Perhaps I could ask for someone to listen.

I'm still not used to being just a person. It's been a very long time.

alright
so it's an adjustment

i'm just saying we've got a clinic now so maybe someone in there is a licensed therapist or something

[Will Tim take this advice? Nope. He does not, as a rule, go to the clinic. Ever, if he can help it.]

I feel as if I would have heard of this previously, but there is no harm in checking. I appreciate it.

I suppose there would be no help in asking for recommendations though, since you don't have a point of contact?

[He knows, Tim. Everybody knows. That won't stop him from saying something.]

don't tend to go there so not really no

[Arguably, he needs therapy quite a bit. Arguably, because he's sure as hell not disclosing his shit to anyone if he can help it. Not unless they're already in the know.]

I expected as much. But I would still feel remiss not to mention it to you as well.

I appreciate your concern, though. It's kind of you.

[He feels like he's been unrelentingly rude this whole time and now he gets that he's "kind"?]

got some pretty low standards don't you

I feel as though I should remind you that Taako is my boyfriend. Most make judgement of my standards based on him.

Personally, I don't care about perceived 'standards'. You took the time where you did not need to. I know a kindness when I see it, no matter the scope of it's impact.

yeah and

[As far as Tim knows, the worst Taako has done is...set up a shop in the Storyteller's Temple? And that wasn't even a bad thing.]

that's pretty much the bare minimum for decency

The standards of what is decent, and the effort someone is willing to go through for another, are entirely subjective. You made a choice. I am simply glad you made the choice to be kind.

I needn't press this further. Just know you have my sincere thanks.

[There's no way to respond to this without coming across as a dick. Is there?]

[No. Not really.]

fine
whatever

Edited 2020-01-30 06:46 (UTC)

[And yet, it proves his point. He choses not to do it. He choses kindness.]

Alright. I'll speak with you when I see you. And keep your words in mind.

[And he closes out of the conversation, trying to respond to others who have questions and words for him.]

voice (backdated to dec 1)

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